Post by wwjbcd on Feb 20, 2016 2:14:15 GMT
The NJFC's official press conference for their upcoming show Stardom went off without a hitch for The Johnimant Species save one: Kurt Newman. Of course. But we're not here to talk about the future, we're here to talk about the now.
And the now is the NJFC's newest Global Champion. The now is Canada's Greatest Athlete. The now... is Johnny Bonecrusher!
So it's apropos that our scene occurs with him in it! Now, since there's just over a week left until the show to end all shows begins, our aforementioned scene does not occur in Japan, rather, back in the good ol' U S of A, where The Johnny will be competing for the Future Stars of Wrestling's 12th show tomorrow at the 2300 Arena in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Inside the Wild Samoan Training Center located at 309 E Hamilton St
in Allentown, The Pre-Millennium Wrestler is workin' out the kinks by workin' over the trainees. It's win-win!
After an intense submission session with a much larger and younger rookie, JBC decides it's time for a break. He checks his weight, pats himself down with a towel, then cracks open a cold, refreshing, thirst-quenching, hit-the-spot... Gatorade, of course. Then he notices the cameras!
"Oh! I didn't see you folks there!"
Oh, that Johnny, he knew they were there! He knew!
"Well, since you're here anyway, welcome to the illustrious Wild Samoan Training Center! Remember The Headshrinkers? Remember Samu? He runs this joint! He's not here right now, though, so no autograph hounding. I mean, I can sign some stuff, I don't know if I happen to have anything to sign around, though..."
He looks around, but then he spots something off-camera, and pulls it into view: a big stack of Johnny Bonecrusher glossies and a gloss-friendly black marker!
"Oh, wait a minute! I indeed came prepared. Be sure to line up, single file, no shoving to the front!"
The camera intentionally pans around to reveal no fucks given. When it comes back around to The Johnny, he doesn't look impressed.
"You know, you could have let me have this one."
He plops the props down on the counter as he exhales sharply in irritation.
"Anyway, let's cut the bullshit and get to why you're here. New Japan Fighting Championship. The granddaddy of them all, Stardom. The Global Championship, my Global Championship, on the line for the first time under my ownership, against a man who truly deserves this shot, not that thieving abomination Nurse Kinsley, not that opportunistically greedy-ass Kurt Newman, no, this man actually earned his shot at my title.
'The Iceman' Stefan Raab. He's the one that's been waiting all this time for this opportunity, and you other jabronis, let me make one thing... PERFECTLY CLEAR:"
The rookies pop for that most beloved of catchphrases that's been missing from his rants as of late. It might come off as a little sarcastic, a little forced, but they'll learn to act better with time- erm, I mean, it's still real to me, dammit!
"None of you... none... of you... are going to ruin this for us. This is our time now; you've had your little fun, ruined my biggest victory in far too long, left me broken and with no belt, but look at me now, ya rudies!"
JBC does some stretches, bends and twists his arms, then holds out his arms as if to say, "See?"
"Even at 37, The Johnny's a quick-healer! The type of pain you jokers left me in was fleeting; the type I give back to you in due time will be forever!
But enough about you two for now. As I said, this is all about Bonecrusher-Raab, Global Championship, Ladder Match. The officials are going to put my belt, special delivered by what's-her-nuts, hung above the ring, and the only way to get that sucker down is to climb... that... ladder."
A student comes up to Johnny with a ladder of all things! He takes it from them and props it up, placing one foot on the first rung.
"I'm a visual guy, so I thought I'd share with you what we're dealing with here."
He puts his other foot on the second rung.
"Now, I'm not going to condescend to you fine folks watching this, because we all know what role this plays in a Ladder Match, right?"
He places his first foot onto the third rung.
"It's really as simple as it gets, kids. I keep on doing this..."
He continues to climb the ladder until he's just one rung from the top.
"...until I can reach the Global Championship. Then I win!"
JBC pantomimes unlatching the belt, raising it in the air, and placing it around his waist. The smirk from his face soon begins to fade.
"All the while trying to defrost The Iceman enough that I can actually do this without getting knocked off-"
And sure enough, someone indeed shoves the ladder over, causing The Johnny to come crashing down as other students gasp and shout out in shock.
...But when the camera pans down to check on Johnny, he's reclined on a series of mats, resting his head on his hand.
"That could have been bad, huh?"
Johnny gets back up and off the stack of mats.
"And it could still be bad, if something like that happens at The Tokyo Dome in eight days. Hey, Raab's going to have to try a stunt like that, because if it's the choice between winning or losing, you've got to do whatever it takes to become a champion.
I'm going to do what it takes to stay a champion. I've been hellbent on getting over that year and a half rut I've been in, and my determination culminated in me winning the Global Championship. To that end, I've got to get back to this. Later."
And with that, Johnny looks back at his stack of glossies and shakes his head.
"What am I supposed to do with these now?"
And the now is the NJFC's newest Global Champion. The now is Canada's Greatest Athlete. The now... is Johnny Bonecrusher!
So it's apropos that our scene occurs with him in it! Now, since there's just over a week left until the show to end all shows begins, our aforementioned scene does not occur in Japan, rather, back in the good ol' U S of A, where The Johnny will be competing for the Future Stars of Wrestling's 12th show tomorrow at the 2300 Arena in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Inside the Wild Samoan Training Center located at 309 E Hamilton St
in Allentown, The Pre-Millennium Wrestler is workin' out the kinks by workin' over the trainees. It's win-win!
After an intense submission session with a much larger and younger rookie, JBC decides it's time for a break. He checks his weight, pats himself down with a towel, then cracks open a cold, refreshing, thirst-quenching, hit-the-spot... Gatorade, of course. Then he notices the cameras!
"Oh! I didn't see you folks there!"
Oh, that Johnny, he knew they were there! He knew!
"Well, since you're here anyway, welcome to the illustrious Wild Samoan Training Center! Remember The Headshrinkers? Remember Samu? He runs this joint! He's not here right now, though, so no autograph hounding. I mean, I can sign some stuff, I don't know if I happen to have anything to sign around, though..."
He looks around, but then he spots something off-camera, and pulls it into view: a big stack of Johnny Bonecrusher glossies and a gloss-friendly black marker!
"Oh, wait a minute! I indeed came prepared. Be sure to line up, single file, no shoving to the front!"
The camera intentionally pans around to reveal no fucks given. When it comes back around to The Johnny, he doesn't look impressed.
"You know, you could have let me have this one."
He plops the props down on the counter as he exhales sharply in irritation.
"Anyway, let's cut the bullshit and get to why you're here. New Japan Fighting Championship. The granddaddy of them all, Stardom. The Global Championship, my Global Championship, on the line for the first time under my ownership, against a man who truly deserves this shot, not that thieving abomination Nurse Kinsley, not that opportunistically greedy-ass Kurt Newman, no, this man actually earned his shot at my title.
'The Iceman' Stefan Raab. He's the one that's been waiting all this time for this opportunity, and you other jabronis, let me make one thing... PERFECTLY CLEAR:"
The rookies pop for that most beloved of catchphrases that's been missing from his rants as of late. It might come off as a little sarcastic, a little forced, but they'll learn to act better with time- erm, I mean, it's still real to me, dammit!
"None of you... none... of you... are going to ruin this for us. This is our time now; you've had your little fun, ruined my biggest victory in far too long, left me broken and with no belt, but look at me now, ya rudies!"
JBC does some stretches, bends and twists his arms, then holds out his arms as if to say, "See?"
"Even at 37, The Johnny's a quick-healer! The type of pain you jokers left me in was fleeting; the type I give back to you in due time will be forever!
But enough about you two for now. As I said, this is all about Bonecrusher-Raab, Global Championship, Ladder Match. The officials are going to put my belt, special delivered by what's-her-nuts, hung above the ring, and the only way to get that sucker down is to climb... that... ladder."
A student comes up to Johnny with a ladder of all things! He takes it from them and props it up, placing one foot on the first rung.
"I'm a visual guy, so I thought I'd share with you what we're dealing with here."
He puts his other foot on the second rung.
"Now, I'm not going to condescend to you fine folks watching this, because we all know what role this plays in a Ladder Match, right?"
He places his first foot onto the third rung.
"It's really as simple as it gets, kids. I keep on doing this..."
He continues to climb the ladder until he's just one rung from the top.
"...until I can reach the Global Championship. Then I win!"
JBC pantomimes unlatching the belt, raising it in the air, and placing it around his waist. The smirk from his face soon begins to fade.
"All the while trying to defrost The Iceman enough that I can actually do this without getting knocked off-"
And sure enough, someone indeed shoves the ladder over, causing The Johnny to come crashing down as other students gasp and shout out in shock.
...But when the camera pans down to check on Johnny, he's reclined on a series of mats, resting his head on his hand.
"That could have been bad, huh?"
Johnny gets back up and off the stack of mats.
"And it could still be bad, if something like that happens at The Tokyo Dome in eight days. Hey, Raab's going to have to try a stunt like that, because if it's the choice between winning or losing, you've got to do whatever it takes to become a champion.
I'm going to do what it takes to stay a champion. I've been hellbent on getting over that year and a half rut I've been in, and my determination culminated in me winning the Global Championship. To that end, I've got to get back to this. Later."
And with that, Johnny looks back at his stack of glossies and shakes his head.
"What am I supposed to do with these now?"
